Grow a soul! make art!

Last updated, April,7th 2012.
I am back. gladly.
and now...where do i start.

The habit of pondering over a cup of chai latte in a cafe never changed since college. only wish i can be sipping from a mug, not a plastic cup; sitting on a leather couch not a plastic stool, and maybe i would go for a good pastry too (if they have one). Well, on a cold snowing Saturday night in NYC. This is somewhat Fine.

And this is what i have gained...from my 6 and half years of....Education, to become an architect. Rather, i developed a paticular taste, such as :Lilies needs to be white wrapped in black and white newspaper; Candles need to be held by wine glasses instead of candle holders; books need to be second hand, with underlines and comments etc. etc.

And here comes the hole, that emerged, disappearing, and reemerged again in its most glorious form. GLORIOUS.  I am lost again, in the concrete jungle. sometimes i wonder if i am building my dream here, or burying one in the most dynamic and diverse city. He is right, a big comfort bed makes you too comfortable. Yep, i have been missing the daylight, on the days i am off. I am too comfortable that it hurts.  I lost my passion. i have been there, so many times. Wait...what is my dream again?

I have been reading somewhat a lot lately, reading some easy readings comfortably. McQueen is one of them (What a gorgeous last name). Working in a firm is hard, where your contribution in a project might be a column in the back corner of the building. Not significant enough to callout, and nothing to do with your style, your aesthetics. Irrelevant to me. except that i drew it in CAD. Mcqueen didnt like working for Givenchy or Gucci. But he did, after some people told him not to, after him laughing at Galliano taking the head designer position. He did, because it helps to finance his own line: help him to do what he really wants to do. And, It helps him get internationally recognized.Theres a fine line between idealistic and unrealistic. The latter are arrogant and ignorant. But, Mcqueen had his 5 seasons of collection on already by the time he's the head designer of Givenchy!
Darian, Darian, Darian, Start making NOW , start drawing NOW! NOW!

After you had a few drinks at a bar, realizing you only got a few pennys left in your pocket (the rest is all stolen), what will you do? Got up to the coin machine, and end up winning a 2500 Euros. It's an attitude of all or nothing. Its a good attitude.

My days have scared me. I have been doing the exact same thing on my days off. No excitement, no progress to anything. pure comfort. While it might be good for a 100+ year old, certainly not for me. EVERYDAY IS OPPORTUNITY.

This type of snowy day reminds me of IOWA. The days running with a bloody orange sky in the background, avoiding crow poops.
College was good, now i thought of it. At least i was courages. I was also arrogant, but i am not afraid to be over the top. I was lost at times, but i am not afraid to express. I was critical, but I loved everything and everybody.

I wasnt so bad.

Grow a Soul!